-Medical student: reads entire article but does not understand what any of it means.
-intern: uses journal as a pillow during nights on call.
-resident: would like to read article but eats dinner instead.
chief_resident: skips article entirely and reads the classifieds.
-junior attending: reads and analyzes entire article in order to pimp medical students.
-senior attending: reads abstracts and quotes the literature liberally.
-research attending: reads entire article, reanalyzes statistics and looks up all references, usually in lieu of sex.
-chief of service: reads references to see if he/she was cited anywhere.
-private attending: doesn’t buy journals in the first place but keeps an eye open for medical articles that make it into Time or Newsweek.
-emeritus attending: reads entire article but does not understand what any of it means