You Know You’re a Nurse When… Part 1
You Know You’re a Nurse When… Part 3
-You occasionally park in the space with the ‘Physicians Only’ sign, and knock it over.
-You’ve ever told a patient to ‘move toward the light.’
-You’ve ever run out of linens, syringes, IV fluid, meds, and patience all at the same time
In_a_critical situation, the most highly qualified clinician will offer the most advice and the least support.
-You believe the more equipment you see on a nurses belt, the newer they are
-You believe that idiots that get into car crashes are the first ones to complain how bumpy the ambulance ride is.
-You know you are a night nurse when:
-You hope there’s a special place in Hell for the inventor of the call light.
-You believe the definition of stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you haven’t fallen asleep yet
-You think pizza, cookies and coke make a balanced meal.
-You can only tell time with a 24-hour clock.
-You believe that saying, ‘It can’t get any worse’ causes it to get worse just to show you it can.
-You wash your hands before you go to the bathroom
-You believe old nurses never die, they just go PRN
-You call some of your co-workers ‘Flowers in the Field of Medicine’ because they’re bloomin’ idiots
-Everything only happens all at once.
-You’ve ever referred to a suicide-attempt victim as an FTF (Failure to Fly)
-You can tell the pharmacist more about the medicines he is giving you than he can.
-You’ve ever thought a blood pressure cuff would be an excellent gift for Christmas.
-You’ve ever spent more money on a stethoscope than on a car payment.
-You think it is acceptable to use “penis” and “vagina” in a normal conversation.
-You look in your closet and can’t find anything non-medical to wear.
-You don’t have enough ego hypertrophy to be a surgeon.
-You believe any job where you can drive to work in pajamas is a cool job.
-You don’t eat before driving to work because you want to be an “easy intubation” if you are in an accident.
-Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong and if nothing has gone wrong, you’ve obviously don’t understand the situation.
-The ER is a mixture of can do, can’t do, and why the hell not!