9. You can intubate your friends at parties.
8. Have you ever met a happy internist?
7._You don’t have enough ego hypertrophy to be a surgeon.
6. You can comfort anxious patients with, “I know just how you feel. It’s my first anesthetic, too.”
5. Any job where you can drive to work in green pajamas is a cool job.
4. You can park next to rich doctors like ophthalmologists.
3. You can cover your mistakes with Versed.
2. If you get bored on the weekends, you can give yourself a spinal.
1. No office, no overhead, no rectal exams!!!