”I asked my wife what she would do if I won the lottery.
She said she would take half and then leave me.
I told her I won $6.00, now here’s $3.00. By By !”
-She should leave you for your spelling: “bye bye”
-man, you should had her to sign a prenup! lol!!
———————————————————-
“I won $10!!! Please, no phone calls.”
-LOL I see lady luck paid you a visit last night…niiiice! 
-.37 cents a year for 27 years.. Not bad my friend.
-…i have your ex-wife on the other line…
—————————————————–
“I missed by 5 numbers, so close.”
-You must have a system…do share.
-i didn’t buy a ticket at all i’m think was closer than you
-Bought five tickets not one matching number. There should be a prize for that.
-I didn’t even get to play. Lucky me!
————————————————–
“RATS! I hope my boss doesn’t get in before me on Monday and open that “I Quit” letter I left on his desk.”
-I guess you better burn the building down so he doesn’t find the letter
———————————————-
“My husband and I went in on tickets with our coworkers…after splitting the winnings…we are the proud winners of $0.66!”
-I think someone in the group got 67 cents. you got cheated!
-Before or after taxes?
-My advice is to invest those winnings in real estate…lol
-your taxes will be .33 cents
-The tax man is on his way!
-That’s awesome, right there. Don’t let the money go to your head.
————————————————
$640 Millions Jackpot
“Looks like I’ll still be living “IN A VAN DOWN BY THE RIVER”
———-
“I WANT A RECOUNT, I have the winning ticket they just drew the wrong numbers! “
———-
“I have for sale, 10 Mega Million quick picks lotto tickets. Good condition, one day old, $9.00 obo.”
———-
“I’m not a loser…just a delayed winner!”
———-
“I just can’t believe it! I was SO FRIGGIN SURE that I was gonna win!”
———-
“At least not winning saves a whole lot of deleting of Facebook friends this morning.”
———-
“I’m 93 years old and I just won the lottery. When I die, I’m leaving it all to my turtle.”
———-
“I won $2. Still deciding on whether to take the lump sum or the 26 annual payments.”
———-
“I won $3. Problem is I spent $5 on the ticket. So 40% of what I spent was deficit. Hey, I could be president of the USA!”
———-
“Congrats and best wishes to the winners!! Now let’s watch all the long lost relatives and friends come popping out of the woodwork”
———-
“I am glad it is over, now I can go back to fantasizing about women again instead of money.”
———-
“til’ next time, we don’t give up we’re proud gamblers!”
———-
Subscribe to “Best Medical Careers’ RSS!”
Subscribe to “Best Medical Careers” by Email
Twitter:”Best Medical Careers”,
Facebook:”Best Medical Careers”
Posted in 